Jump to content

Top 10 reasons why the Blue Devils won't win tomorrow


Recommended Posts

So, as we had in 2009 and 2010, I figured we could start a *humorous* top 10 list of why the Blue Devils will not win.

DISCLAIMER: Please, don't bash the corps. This is meant to give everyone a few laughs, whether you are a die-hard BD fan or you don't agree with them.

So without further ado, here is the list:

10. Mandarins have accidentally summoned a mighty spirit that will emerge from the heavens during BD's show and cause chaos. Blue Devils' score drops 50 points due to having their show just utterly ruined. Mandarins gain 50 points because, well, summoning a Mayan deity has to give you at least an extra 50 points in GE.

09: Phantom revolts and sends both the Chinese and the Romans on Blue Devils, simultaneously beheading and stabbing their drum major, all while shouting "I AM CALIFCUS!!!"

08: The Cavaliers add 15 dance segments with each being 15 minutes long to the end of their show. Boston Crusaders win because there is simply no time remaining for Bluecoats - Blue Devils to perform.

07: George Hopkins

06: We actually get a French speaking judge who realizes that the French narrator has been sending subliminal messages to the judges the entire season.

05: The Cadets add more Linus lines to the show, which pushes them past BD, just because Linus melts everyone's heart.

04: Blue Knights make an actual spaceship to land during their show. Aliens win with a score that is out of this world.

03: After realizing how amazing the Jersey Surf tribute show is, Bridgemen find a way to perform at Finals. They win. By lot.

02: *Possible spoiler for Dark Knight Rises* Carolina Crown tries to add more superhero elements to their show, including Batman dropping in on Blue Devils show shouting "WHERE'S THE TRIGGER????" during Blue Devils show and the scores. Crown wins because no one can hear over trying to figure out exactly what Batman is saying.

02b. Or, Crown hires Morgan Freeman to narrate their show for them. With Morgan Freeman, you can't lose. Ever.

01: ...you decide what the number one reason is. Please, keep them in good faith, and don't intentional bash the corps. Blue Devils die-hards, please don't take this seriously, as it is honestly just an attempt at humor.

So, what is that number one reason, fellow DCPer's? :tongue: Or post several.

A mag 7 earthquake hits Indy and all the other corps are to "shaken" to show up... but not BD because they are from earthquake country baby!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

11. Crossmen decides: 'We've already beaten one Blue corps this weekend; why not three more?'

10. Spirit rolls lucky sevens. BD rolls snake-eyes.

9. Blue Knights use alien mind force powers on judges, fly to top

8. Madison 'wheels' themselves to win

7. Boston Crusaders unleash real Titans, destroy all other corps

6. Cavaliers get their swagger back...famous

5. Bluecoats finally take off the masks - they could have won every show this year had they just let their real selves emerge

4. Vanguard unveils new 'Music of the Night'/'Great Gate of Kiev'/'Simple Gifts'/'Bottle Dance' ending

3. Cadets give themselves an early Christmas present - Z-pull

2. Phantom's designers pull judges aside before show 'All you need is love...'

1. Crown's staff tells corps, 'OK, you're finally ready for the next dynamic level.'

  • Like 8
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...