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Reality is a cruel mistress


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This topic might be misplaced, but the all age forum seems to be a suitable location. How many of you have been to a show or a rehearsal and had a chance to talk to a young DCA corps member? I'm talking about a conversation lasting more than 5 minutes. Maybe you are involved with a corps as a volunteer or as a  management team member. Lets say you have been around the activity for more than 20 years. Here's a sample of what I'm on about:

A young corps member with a few years of marching band, WGI, or maybe a season or two of drum corps regales me with their vast experience in all things marching music. They don't know me. They don't know my history in the activity. (this is season number 50 for me) When I try to contribute to the discussion, I'm interrupted and reminded that they know what they are talking about and of their past accomplishments. They weren't born when I won a DCA championship in 1996. How do you handle such a conversation?  There are two ways of responding; You can forcefully remind them that you've been around the block more than a time or two, listing every win and every corps you've been a member of (going back decades) until they realize they sound ridiculous. What will that accomplish? At precisely the time that you and others are trying to grow their experience and skills, you've made them feel inferior.

I remain silent. That's how I respond. I try to keep in mind that this is their day in the sun and as such, a chance for them to achieve what I did, so many years ago. Doing that takes all my patience, but the end result is (hopefully) a successful marching member of a corps that's on it's way to greatness. I think the "old stories" are best shared with my peers and not with today's young members. They can't relate, having not been born when the stories originated. The reality seems to be that what we accomplished in our day(s), eventually becomes irrelevant and uninteresting. I paint brake drums silver, run errands, repair broken things and sit on the sidelines, whenever I'm not doing anything that needs doing. That's reality enough for one lifetime.  :)

 

Edited by hairbear
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Probably a prudent call, Steve.

You're right... it's their time now. If they ask about your experience, share it... if not, a good idea to just smile and go along.  LOL.

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i've never really had that chat where it became about titles etc. I've run into many who like to questions about "back then" ( for me 80's and 90's). and once in a while i'll tell a tale from Dads time before me....as well as I ask them questions about things now. And no matter what, I tell them to enjoy their time as I did mine, and tell them not to be that "back in my day" guy I've tried to avoid being.

Plus one asked if I really did know Fran Haring, and I said yes, and told them he actually does have clothes that won't blind you

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My daughter is marching her 2nd season in the Sunrisers.  Between me and my ex-wife, she has heard all about "back then" her whole life!!  She has recently been asking questions about those days.

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Rode with members who had been around a while. Kinda feel sorry for folks who never got a chance to hear those stories or too self involved to care. Nothing like seeing the couple foot tall VFW National trophy from 5 years before you were born to wake you up

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There's a fine line between hearing the occasional "back in the day" story and being constantly bombarded with them. There's a time and place for those stories, certainly...but the rest of the time today's members would rather be out making their own stories.

And that's how it should be.

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5 hours ago, CHRISP said:

My daughter is marching her 2nd season in the Sunrisers.  Between me and my ex-wife, she has heard all about "back then" her whole life!!  She has recently been asking questions about those days.

Heh... several years back, some young members with the Sunrisers asked a couple of us Stone Age vets to share some of the old stories.

We 1) didn't share many of those stories...LOL... some things are simply best left unsaid. :innocent: And 2) we gave the new crew the PG-13 version of the stories we did share!!! :tongue:

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29 minutes ago, Fran Haring said:

Heh... several years back, some young members with the Sunrisers asked a couple of us Stone Age vets to share some of the old stories.

We 1) didn't share many of those stories...LOL... some things are simply best left unsaid. :innocent: And 2) we gave the new crew the PG-13 version of the stories we did share!!! :tongue:

I explained to someone at work that you guys never took long bus trips to shows unless absolutely necessary because, well... you guys never traveled all that well. :guinesssmilie::laugh::innocent:

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