Creative things Instructors Say

[Musical_Spinner]

Spawned out of another thread. What are some things instructors have said or yelled at you? Sometimes they can be pretty funny. Use your own discretion in citing names or guards.

I once kept forgetting where my new spot on the floor was so our flag tech "gently" threw a pen at me in the middle of rehearsal so I could write it down.

Other things I've heard at rehearsal:

"It's a bed sheet on a six foot pole! CATCH SOMETHING!"

"Oy, you have more planes than JFK airport"

One time my rookie year me and my friend were having a bad rehearsal, but we were still trying (always important)

While learning some drill, Peter Garrow in all seriousness had us walk to the middle of the floor, holding hands, and then walk down the center of the floor just to get a little bit of a laugh. I thought it was funny, but my friend was less than thrilled.

What's scary is that it might have ended up working in the show.

[Jeremy Denzer]

6 feet of pole, 5 feet of silk, 30 square feet of opportunity........said to a flag who was dropping a lot.

[Will]

Not necessarily creative, but still fun -

"If you hit the wall, you'll die"

"Just get it up there!" - refering to tosses

"FIGURE IT OUT!" - a personal favorite

[epwtrguard05]

When one of my girls gets hurt and they get all dramatic about it, I tell them ..........

"It'll get better before you get married"

And of course the instructors mantra ......

"If it's not bleeding or broken get back out there"

Another one of my personal favorites .......

"You throw like a bunch of girls"

This always illicits a few laughs and some looks ......... because they are all girls!!!

[Brassislife]

Some of the things i have said to my kids....

"if you catch it, it wont hit you"

"you have two hands, two feet and a mouth, catch it somehow"

This one is reffering to the beginning of our show in which half the guard is lying down....

"close your legs, your not in heat"

every instructors favorite "one more time, uno mas, or one more again" take your pick

"dont ever go on a date, because you rush so much youll end up going through mickey d's"

"take two ticks and figure it out!!"

p.s. if you throw oranges, they dont bruise the kids!!!!! j/k

Edited May 19, 2007 by Brassislife

[Athena]

Throughout all of our guard seasons...

"Is the ground going anywhere? Then don't look at it!!!!"

(Or some version of that)

"If it lands within a yard of you, you could have caught it somehow."

(And I'm sure everyone hears this...)

"If you aren't having fun, you aren't doing it right!!"

[Will]

" We don't spin at your boobs, we spin at our belly buttons!!"

"If you feel stupid, it's perfect"

"If it hurts, then you know you're doing it right"

[Looks Like Liquid Purple]

(After a drop)

"Now what did that ground do to you that makes you want to hit it?"

[Jak]

"Step with your left foot. No, your other left."

"That was B, A, D."

"You couldn't catch a cold in the pediatrician's waiting room."

[profhill]

We were learning a new toss and several members kept dropping, it was like 15 minutes of the same people dropping. The instructor said, "It's a good thing those flags aren't babies, because they'd be dead or ######## if they were."